On Turning 50

Through bad planning I found myself on my own on the eve of my 50th birthday.

I had pleaded with loved ones not to let me be alone on my birthday, I cried constantly on my 40th, but had arrived back from holiday a few days too early due to a hotel upgrade which had changed the dates slightly (which was definitely worth it, the picture of me above was taken in the lobby of the best hotel in Havana).

The only feasible plan was to open a bottle of champagne first thing and sip it therapeutically throughout the day while waiting for young one to dutifully pop round and wish me well, but still, the evening before had to be negotiated and by 10pm I was getting decidedly nervous about the whole thing so I called my good friend Silvia Hartmann.

I tried to sound as nonchalant as I could but she immediately sensed the underlying terror and although she could have quite easily just chatted for a couple of hours to get me through until midnight she suggested doing a magical ritual, a kind of rite of passage to make sure my entry point into my 50th year was just perfect.

We started by thinking about what I had achieved in my 49th year and I think both of us were a little astonished by the list, most of which were firsts for me and at 49 that kind of blew me away!

  • Wrote and published my first book
  • Wrote my first sacred song
  • Recorded my first hypnotic induction
  • Went to Cuba
  • Swam with dolphins
  • Exhibited my paintings
  • Created my own Tachyon Star Stones
  • Got my piano back
  • Went to Paris

Silvia then suggested some other things to do finished by a hot, deep bath with added goodies, so we said goodbye and I set about first doing a complete Beauty T Treatment.

I touched and stroked every part of me as I was affirming my Creator given perfection, even covering my internal organs and systems and when I reached my face I used a mirror and really looked into my eyes and couldn’t believe this amazing being was me and realised as well that this year was the first time I had really loved being me.

I then counted my many, many blessings, one of which is living in a wondrous place on the beach and another, having such an amazing friend as Silvia, then put on the hypnodream Ice River and took a trip to visit Father Birthday with a list of presents for myself with plenty of wildcards thrown in for unexpected surprises throughout the year.

I finally ran a bath, lit a load of candles, sprinkled rose oil and champagne in the water and stepped in just before midnight struck and felt so happy and so utterly at peace with myself.

I slept like a log all night and woke feeling so relaxed and excited about the year ahead. Even a huge helium balloon with a massive 50 stamped on it that arrived soon after from my sisters raised a laugh but no tears as would have been the case without the ritual.

A most wonderful experience and a marvellous entry point into the rest of my most interesting and blessed life!

Nicola Quinn

[Originally posted 31-03-05]